Two Pictures of Waiting

On May 3rd I was given a bouquet of Stargazer Lilies which had not yet bloomed, by a boy that has indeed become close to my heart. Stargazer lilies I thought to myself, I LOVE these. How could he have known? The fragrance, the vibrant color, the unique curve of each bloom yet the similar star shape of each. I could go on.

Clearly I was excited, and impatient by the end of day 2. My flowers where still only pods and to my eye they had started to loose their luster. 

On the morning of day 3 I stood in my kitchen listening to my morning coffee brew and I stared at them: Why would they not bloom? Had they not been bought for my pleasure and enjoyment? Wasn't there purpose to bring the sweet fragrance into my home? sigh. I would wait yet another day.

That night the flower buyer asked me, "How are your flowers?" to which I began my lament on how excited I was, and how sad I was that my Joy for what was to come in my flowers had not been met. How all I wanted was just one to bloom and then, then I would be happy. No. Actually I wanted all of them to bloom and then I would be happy...but this waiting was starting to wear on me. To which he smiled and looked at my impatient (acting) 5 year old sad face and said, "Melinda, think of it this way: If its taking five days to bloom, then you have five more days to enjoy them, than if they where blooming on the first day that I gave them to you, and you will be able to enjoy them for even longer" 

I paused... shook my head. How correct was he, when all I could do was sit in front of them and say OPEN, OPEN, OPEN like that stupid Mervyn's Commercial! As if being sad, staring at them, would make my waiting shorter. 

The next few days I enjoyed the pod's, I enjoyed the essence of the wait. I began to anticipate the beauty that would be coming with out even being able to see any progress. 

On March 11th, EIGHT 8 DAYS LATER, such a long time to wait, my first pod BLOOMED! Over the next few days I watched each one open in their own time making the vase look prettier and prettier and if I am honest my allergies getting stronger and stronger.  (Yeah I moved them to my room the second they started blooming...yeah I am suffering ha ha, worth it)

As this process moved forward I was struck by the by the fact that this is SO our lives. I claim that I am waiting on the Lord, and the reality is that I am sad, impatient and I don't believe that the end result will be as beautiful. I subconsciously believe that as I wait on God with each passing day the answer will loose its value. If one is truly honest they will find that while waiting on the Lord as trying as it is, that he indeed will fulfill our every needs, often larger than we can imagine, in ways we never thought.

Why do we sit staring wishing and hoping that the "pods" of our life will open today? Why do we question the God of the universe as if he has not and will not answer us? Why in the days I wait do I think I do not hear his voice?

Truth is I hear his voice in the waiting. I choose to anticipate the beauty that is ahead of me, even thought it is hard to wait.