Hope & Spiritual retreats

"Hope lies in braving the chaos & waiting calmly, with trust in the ONE who loves us. The idea is to still ourselves, to draw ourselves back to the deeper life that flows beneath the deeper life that flows beneath the surface of our days. " 

- Sue Monk Kidd

Today is an un-official Come Away (Spiritual retreat). It is a day I was suppose to be on last month but it slipped my mind as I had much to do at the office. Slipped my mind. sadness of the busyness of ministry. The whole theme this month is HOPE. I have spent all morning in the beautiful redwoods of Mount Hermon where I live. and now as my distraction grows I will wander down to the shores of a random Santa Cruz Beach to finish the thoughts on hope, as well as re-cap this spiritual journey that this Come Away 2007 - 2008 "Arms Wide Open"has brought me through. I realize that today I have broken the rules by even typing this blog but as I reveled in the beauty of it and how I so often do not write about what God is teaching me through them, I felt compelled to say something here.

May today and this week you find time away from the busyness to listen to what God is saying to you. What is God inviting you into? I know he has been messing with me this morning...in a good way.  And the song Acres of Hope by Shane and Shane keeps returning to my heart and mind this morning. 

I leave you with this:

Christ before me, Prepare the way

Christ behind me, restrain my inclination to go alone.

Christ about, shade me from the flames of the enemy.

Christ beneath me, become the bottom when the door drops away.

Christ to the Left & to the Right, SUPPORT my ARMS so that I might fly. 

Waiting Inevitability

If you didn't know already I have been involved last year and this year in "Come Away's" Basically once a month from 9 - 3 pm I am involved in a guided spiritual retreat. 

I was looking back at my journal for the month of November...and Its just Funny how God has been keeping this topic so close to my heart, for the last really 3 months...and I suppose that indeed it will continue for a few months more! Here are my thoughts and quotes that touched my heart throughout the of solitude and reflection.

Waiting...

"To wait apon God is Not a fruitless wast of time or a sign of inefficient, ineffective prayer: it is our God - given work, our assigned task." Margaret Guenther 

"Waiting develops a willingness to be changed, a time for God to Act upon me as I wait for further direction & deeper Understanding."

This quote makes me wonder if I actually believe it. I know that it does create a willingness to change, as I have seen that in my walk, even though I am not always willing to be changed. To change brings on fear, fear makes me stubborn (and we know how stubborn I already am), frozen, and holding my breath. I find for me, at times I wait well and calm, and other times I am no longer calm and in no way do I look like a person that waits well. Fear often overcomes me.

"The invitation to wait, especially during Advent, is to allow God to fill the open receptacle of my heart with God's spirit."

My hesitation: How God do I know when you have filled me?

              Which Brings me this picture: Filling a coffee cup @ a convenience store. 

                                                     (I travel a lot...its my only connection with energy on long drives)

How do you know its full? I don't want to pull away thinking its full and Short myself my Vanilla Cap! But if I don't let go early enough my cup it overflows & burns my hand. Am I fearful that you Lord will burn my hand? Its as if I wait on you, I believe I'm going to get too much and I will not be able to handle it. If I cannot wait for you My God, and I only receive a half portion, and I believe that it will sustain me. 

To often we pull away and don't wait for God's certain goodness. I suppose this is my journey. And I am reminded on a daily basis. To wait upon the Lord. 

A dear old friend sent me this verse, "Trust in the Lord, be still and wait patiently for Him. Fret not yourself." Psalm 37

  And so I wait.

Still moving Forward, but waiting on His Plan, His Schedule, His Patience. 

Arms Wide Open

Today: Was a "Come Away" Day.

Come Aways are led by my pastor and his wife. They are spiritual retreats, once a month, from 9 am to 3 pm.

Today was the 1st of this Season...

God and I talked A LOT...& he brought me songs, thoughts, and Questions, more questions.

I am unpacking what it means to be honest about my Desires, and see where they line up with God's Dreams for my life. Can I be vulnerable enough to be open to what that may look like.

That's all I can say right now.